 name:marie grace angelica gonzales bonifacio or often called as: gelowish, gel, gela, angge, boni, angel i am a true blu aquarian and yes, ladies and gentlemen.. i am a bitch. ü natal day: february 13, 1987 i love red, the color yellow, thoughts, quotes, lessons, boOks, talking, weirdness, children, BABIES! being a couchpotato, eating, writing, cooking, dressing up, praying, serving, loving you.. loving red, swimming, tickling you, watching games, kings, bibby, christie, PEJA16, neo!, snagging a smack from you, spongebob, ariel, superman, bathing, originality, irony, theories, screaming, cheering, taking care of you, traveling, philippines, buds, ganon! relatives, milk, kissing you, chocolates, trinklets, accessories, fashion, clothes, shoes, games, drawing, coloring, anything fun, teasing, jungle, hugging you, tickles, saying a lot of stuffs... (ho-hum. this is getting rather tiring.) well, basically, i love to say more but in a nutshell... RED rules!
this is my beloved family.. rotesma3. ro:robert, te:tes, ma:mark anthony, marie grace angelica, michael angelo.. :)
parokya ni tomas. best rOom ever. weird but very much loved.
my fave cartoon character of all times!! :) 'wish i could be.. a part of your world..'
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Tuesday, January 25, 2005
noooo! i'm getting more paranoid by the minute! this is insane! GOD help me! only YOU Lord is my answer right now. please.. hear me.
to akoeto
you really, as in seriously dream of becoming a porn star?! wtf.
uh.. can't you read? its for my lit. in case you didn't get it.
Posted at 1/25/2005 11:39:52 am by geLowish
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Wednesday, January 05, 2005
(sarcastic look) I wanted to be a porn star in Manila. I came here from Negros because my cousin said that its easy living here in Manila. He said that the people are friendly and the houses are original. He drives a white care which is common in the streets of Manila. So I gone, ya know? Only to found out that the care he’s driving is what you call it? A taxi? Sus maryosep! Basta that white car which also comes in yellow and has names on the side. What is it por? Nametags? Personalized cars? And then he said the houses are original. May gulay! It is original! It have tires on top op da roop and they is all compounded in one place. Compounded. Ya know? Dikit-dikit. He also said that the people are prendly. Por dos por santos! The prendly people are those who are drunk and ask por comport. Who dey tink I am? Comport women? Aba! They go to comport rooms ip they want comport womans. My heart was really breaked. I shed tears but didn’t lost heart. I went to this agency and pursued my dream op becoming a porn star. The woman wid balls asked what I like. I said I wanna work wid eggs. Ya know? Eggs. And then I ended up here. Guanyo! Dealing with these eggs. I was talking about betlogs! Tarantadong bakla! I don’t like this. Hmm.. aha! I’m going to take all op these and go to the kanto ober der and sell these. And then I’m going to buy an orange dress and get a room op my own. I want a sacred place, ya know? A place where there are guards who’ll walk around and check for goons. Hah! I’m going to take all op these! (packs eggs and runs. After 4 months.)
(sarcastic look again) I didn’t got the things I want. Why is layp like that? Isn’t it hard as iron? Like what the song say? (ironic plays) my tita always say that ip layp gets me down, I should relax and take it easy. I’m still young that’s my polt. There’s so much I hab to know. Hmph! Yes. I’ll look down because I won’t give up. I’m going to work hard because now I want to live in a place that looks like heaven. Everything is white and people will take care op me. Yes! Yes! That what I want. Like what they say, payt, payt until you succeeded.
Posted at 1/5/2005 10:56:15 am by geLowish
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Saturday, October 30, 2004
i have seen you..
when your smiles and frowns
were so tied up and intermingled
that none -- not even you..
could have said with any sureness
what face you were giving to the crowd...
i have walked with you to subways,
then twenty minutes later
i have been with someone else
and never loved you less...
i have spied on you and looked accusingly,
when i, myself, knew well
that i was in the wrong...
i have wept for you..
about you..
and one time with you.
i have shared your secrets
and kept private secrets of my own...
i have fought with you..
and over you..
loved you and disliked you..
in equal parts and at the same time...
i have thought that i would die
if you failed to turn up on some pre-selected night
and when you didn't --
wished i would...
i have loved you..
never asking if i should.
i have trusted you..
not caring if i could or couldn't.
in company with strangers or friends,
i have smiled and gone on smiling
when i thought no single smile or grin
was left inside me...
if we were unhappy with one the other
why shouldn't it be
just our concern?
i have watched you play
with other people's children
and felt they were our own...
i've heard you hum
some made-up tune at breakfast
and watched you killing time all day
while you awaited killing me at night...
i have lied to you..
for no good reason.
i have troubled you..
and even when i knew it,
sometimes that didn't make me stop...
the things we do in love's name
never stop suprising me.
i'm amazed that love can live at all
through the subterfuge,
pass through all the barricades,
stumble over all the obstacles
we construct and put up in its way...
that first seed wherever planted
must have been a hearty strain.
just now,
what kind of passion stirs inside me
i cannot say.
i feel for you..
and it's as much as love..
but whether it's because i feel you leaving..
slipping from me day by day..
or because i need..
depend on..
want just you..
i have no way of knowing.
our lives together have become so knotted..
moddled up that who's to say
where the heart ended..
and habit started in to open up?
i love you.. -- yes.
but i don't mean for you to know it.
cute.
sembreak's almost over and no more leisure puyats and lakads.
work nanaman. work work work.
been so long since my last update. hahah.
i'm watching fifty first dates for like the nth time! cute movie.
i really like adam sandler. cute.
'wouldn't it be nice if we were older then we wouldn't have to wait so long.. and wouldn't it be nice if we lived
together'
'sometimes life isn't very fair.. but we still have you.'
'love is a very loaded word.. uh, lets see.. i go to this restaurant everyday and i see you reading..
and i love you.. very much. probably more than anybody can ever love another person.'
cute.
i updated this in my ipod and i was screaming like heck when i heard it!! wOot wOot! i like this song:
hukilau was the place
where i first saw your face
we liked each other right away
but you don't remember me the very next day
forgetful lucy
has got a nice kaboosie
i used to trick you into pulling you car so we could chat
but my favorite time was when you beat the shit out of ula with a bat
then we drove up to see dr. keats
and found out why doug always has to change his sheets
forgetful lucy
cracked her head like gary busi
but i still love her so
and i'll never let her go
even if while i'm singing this song
she's wishing i had jacko the walrus such long
forgetful lucy
her lips are so damn juicy
how bout another first kiss.
cute.
Posted at 10/30/2004 7:08:41 am by geLowish
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Saturday, July 03, 2004
totoy tepok sa ebak ng kalapati
totoy tepok sa ebak ng kalapati -- headline ng isang tabloid para sa masang pilipino. ang kwentong ito'y sadyang hindi ko alam sapagkat ang pamagat lamang ang sa aki'y naibahagi. para sa mga taong ebaked [o sa ingles: pOoped.] ito'y nakakatawa. nakakabagabag-isip. nakakaintriga. salamat p're sa pagbahagi ng istorya ng kawawang si totoy. ako'y nangiti. napaisip. naintriga. at i quote: 'tOo much.'
ù
Posted at 7/3/2004 3:28:50 am by geLowish
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Thursday, June 03, 2004
sacramento makes me happy and seemingly sensless words are posted. yaikx.
yeyey! i got a postcard from janina! it's sacramento!!! cOol!! ang ganda and its quite big. :) hahah! thanks! and i miss ya dudette. hope your doing fine there. take care. and don't worry. i am praying for you. :) talagang ok ako! :)
its raining.. and i love it.
i'm a girl who tends to get depressed easily. maybe i need an anti depressant... or maybe i need you.
my prozac.
i love kids. i love having fun with them. i love taking care of them. i love to just be with them. i love kids... i love you.
i. am. a. movie freak. i adore the smart, witty lines thrown at each other. i am amazed by the extreme special effects and even by the smallest props. i love making comments on how the actors act and lOok at their face's expression. i. am. a. movie. freak. *curtsey*
# 1
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Posted at 6/3/2004 7:28:56 pm by geLowish
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Wednesday, May 26, 2004
as i look at the dark road after a tiring day, this silly thought popped.
i was with Jesus..
the lights were closed then smoke was covering the stage..
and we rocked.
HE was sharing the mic with me, singing HIS heart out
wearing HIS cOol blue shirt, matching my red tank
banging our long hairs..
and hell. we were mobbed.
rock on.
JC: so you're standing on the ledge.. it looks like you might fall.. so far down or maybe, you're thinking about jumping
you could have it all if you learn a little paitence
me: for though i cannot fly, i'm not content to crawl
JC: so give me a little credit, have in me a little faith i wanna be with you forever if tomorrow's not too late
me: but its always too late when you've got nothing
JC: so you say..you should never let the sun set on tomorrow before the sun rises today
me: if i am another waste of everything you dreamed of, i will let you down
if i am only here to watch you as you suffer, i will let you down
JC: so you're walking on the edge, and you wait your turn to fall but you're so far gone, that you don't see the hands upheld to catch you
and you could find the fault in the heart that you've been handed
though you cannot fly, you're not content to crawl.
and its always to late when you've got nothing so you say
but you should never let the sun set on tomorrow before the sun rises
me: if i am another waste of everything you hoped of, i will let you down
if i am only here to watch you as you suffer, i will let you down
JC: so you're standing on a ledge, it looks like you might fall
me: if i am another waste of everything you dreamed of, i will let you down
if i am only here to watch you as you suffer, i will let you down
me: the answers we find are never what we had in mind so we make it up as we go along
you don't talk of dreams, i won't mention tomorrow
we won't make those promises that we can't keep
JC: i will never leave you
me: i will not let you down
JC: i will never leave you
me: i will not let you down
ù
# 1
Posted at 5/26/2004 4:10:41 am by geLowish
Permalink
Monday, May 24, 2004
*** pessimists lack faith in GOD. they dwell on the negative thoughts that life brings and are often blinded to see the promise Jesus gives. look, people who often think negatively don't have the faith as strong as a pillar to trust GOD and leave everything to Him. they tend to expect the not-so-good things to happen which leads to their distraction and impeded growth. and of course, we all know that everyone is connected and all that crap so it is not only the pessimist who doesn't grow, but also the people he/she has contorl over. GOD never deserts His children. He loves us toO much to do that. who gives the birds foOd? the shEeps grass? the fish water? it is HIM. and true at that, we are better than the birds and the sheeps and the schoOl of fish. so why do we worry about tomorrow and the day after tomorrow and the next? GOD is with us through everything.. He is with us everyday. yes. i admit. at times we feEl that He isn't there. but we are just toO burdened or jaded to seE the little signs He gives us along the way. the air we breathe.. the blue sky.. the green leaves of the treEs.. the hug from someone... aren't all these signs that HE is all powerful and that He is there? okay. you might
say that i am a little toO optimistic. fine. let's give it a shot of what people call 'the bitter reality'.. problems. chaos. fights. pain. i've read angels and demons and i want to share something:
'terrible things happen in this world. human tragedy seems like proof that God could not possibly be both all-powerful and well- meaning. if He loves us and has the power
to change our situation, He would prevent our pain, would He?'
the camerlengo frowned. 'would He?'
chartrand felt uneasy. had he overstepped his bounds? was this one of those religious questions you just didn't ask? 'well... if God loves us, and He can protect us, He would
have to. it seems He is either omnipotent and uncaring, or benevolent and powerless to help.'
'do you have children, lieutenant?'
chartrand flushed. 'no, signore.'
'imagine you had an eight-year-old son... would you love him?
'of course.'
'would you do everything in your power to prevent pain in his life?'
'of course.'
'would you let him skateboard?
'chartrand did a double take. the camerlengo always seemed oddly 'in touch' for a chamberlain. 'yeah, i guess,' chartrand said. 'sure, i'd let him skateboard, but id tell him
to be careful.'
'so as this child's father, you would give him some basic, good advice and let him go off and make his own mistakes?'
'i wouldn't run behind him and mollycoddle him if that's what you mean.'
'but what if he fell and skinned his knee?'
'he would learn to be more careful.'
the camerlengo smiled. 'so although you have the power to interfere and prevent your child's pain, you choose to show your love by letting him learn his own lessons?'
'of course. pain is part of growing up. its how we learn.'
the camerlengo nodded. 'exactly.'
*** i don't like the idea that just because something terribly bad happened to you, you would let go of your inhibitions and let out your bad, wild side. and in the end, you would put all the blame on that bad incident. like, 'yeah. i used drugs because i was abused.' or 'i run away because i wasn't loved and my life is all shitty.' c'mon. get real. those situations didn't make those choses for you. you. its you who CHOSE to do drugs because you can't take the fact that you've been abused. its you who CHOSE to run away because your life was shitty and all. now, why don't you CHOOSE something productive? like healing yourself of the pain and all? like getting busy. study. pour all your bad feelings over coOking or basketball or singing or drawing or realizing life.. or better yet.. finding GOD. those pain that scarred you shouldn't be cured with adding more pain and disappointments. you shouldn't bandage it with things that will make you feel even worse in the long run. have an open mind.
make gOod choices. don't go loOking for miracles for the miracles are inside you. be the miracle.
*** hate is the opposite of love?? nah. for me, its indifference. loving is feeling for someone.. caring.. being patient and kind and understanding and all. but hate is still feeling for someone though more on the negative pole. but still, you feel for that person. you care that he/she trips and stumbles and then you laugh. you care when he/she makes a fool of himself/herself. you still think of that person. but being indifferent is way worse. you don't care.. anymore. coldness. lack of concern. apathy. lack of sympathy. you don't care if he/she trips and stumbles. you don't care if he/she looks like a fool. and of course, when you're cold, you won't understand.. you won't be patient.. you won't be kind. you just won't. you choose not to love him/her anymore.. its okay if he/she is outta your life. that's the hardest thing to fight.. the hardest thing to accept.. indifference. where is the love? the world seems indifferent. the world seems cold. maybe it needs a blankie to keep it warm. ;p
# 1
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Posted at 5/24/2004 9:44:18 pm by geLowish
Permalink
Saturday, May 22, 2004
hay.. i miss my rOom!! after being with novella, chkizna, mikka, chris, val, corinna, rica and of course the debutant, pristine, i just wish it were the old days na magkikita kami everyday and we get to eat together tuwing lunch and pasahan ng biskwit tuwing klase and kiss dito, hug doOn.. kilitian dito, tawanan doOn.. jokes dito, make faces doOn.. hahah! ang saya saya. napakasafe ng environment. i can just be myself. walang plastikan. prankahan. sensitive sa damdamin ng bawat isa. hay.. buhay hayskul, poreyt parokya ni tomas.. nakakamis. pristine's debut was soOh.. pink and purpley. i was one of the 18 butterflies where i were to open a small box and make a wish and let the butterfy inside fly. sweet and brilliant. i ate buco pandan. swEet yet not 'nakakaumay'... with a punch. she's going to australia. hey mate, keep me posted. she's my left seatmate and always wants a kiss. heheh. alam kong mamimiss mo kiss ko. kaw rin. i'll miss ya and sana tumangkad ka na. ;p
hoy val! happy one year seo sa lunes! hahah!
hey chkiz.. tawa lang ng tawa hah. panalo speech mo kaso natablahan ka ni ponggi at mikka. oks lang. panalo parin ung ilong mo na major close-up. [lol] 'didn't got the message.' [lol]
novella! i'm happy you're happy with your fairy tale life. keep me posted. :)
hey chris.. ibang klase talaga boses mo. nakakatindig balahibo. heheh! galing! isa pa, hah?
mikka.. ayos na ayos ung make-up and hairdo mo na kahapon pang 12. heheh! go with the moves! :)
corrina.. next time na ung mms kasi no load na ko.. and hanep ung dress mo. pinag-usapan niyo ata iyan ng pamilya ni pristine eh! ;p
and to the best.. i miss you. badly.
i'm feeling this song...
hundred days had made me older since the last time that I saw your pretty face
A thousand lights had made me colder and I don’t think I can look at this the same
But all the miles had separate
They disappeared now when I’m dreaming of your face
I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight it’s only you and me
The miles just keep rolling as the people either way to say hello
I hear this life is overrated but I hope that it gets better as we go
I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it’s only you and me
Everything I know, and anywhere I go
it gets hard but it won’t take away my love
And when the last one falls, when it’s all said and done
it gets hard but it won’t take away my love
I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
And tonight girl it’s only you and me
I’m here without you baby but your still on my lonely mind
I think about you baby and I dream about you all the time
I’m here without you baby but your still with me in my dreams
but tonight girl it’s only you and me
#1
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Posted at 5/22/2004 3:54:41 am by geLowish
Permalink
Thursday, May 20, 2004
GOD. its so sad. i burst out crying at the sound of the buzzer. they could have made it to ot but webber didn't get the shot to tie it up. he wasn't on a roll today. it was a sad sad game, really. christie was scoring okay and bibby got less than 20 points. garnet was the one who moved the basketball court. his play was alive. happy birthday -- not. i'm still bitter over this. first time in my life have i cried over a basketball game. GOD. the kings still rule. janina called and her voice was pissed. she was the kings' numero uno fanatico and for her to get through this again was simply.. vexing. hey dudette.. chill. i really dunno the right words to say because i toO was disappointend but hey.. we'll both cry over this and we'll both get pissed and we'll both get through this together. misery loves company.
and i love to be your company. take care handling your red car and goOd luck on the test. will pray for ya. miss ya dudette. glad to have heard your voice.
its raining. i love it. i love the smell. i love the chill. i love the feeling. i feel romantic and melancholy and happy all at the same time. hahah. i'm some wacko, aren't i? i'm so hungry but i'm in no moOd to eat. i just wanna sit here and look at the raindrops falling and breathe in the refreshing smell of rain.
it seems restive and tiring
going thru nothing everyday
wake up.
eat.
bathe.
sleep.
my body is a soulless flesh going
thru what it needs to survive.
and my soul.
yes.
the very key to my existence
seems to have floated away
looking for something to bring it back to its sheath
it seems to be looking for you.
then my heart starts beating.
my body flows with purpose
and happiness it has forgotten.
with a single breath my soul came back.
you said hello and it came back. # 1
ù
Posted at 5/20/2004 4:38:40 pm by geLowish
Permalink
its been what? days since we last been together?
hah! well, i don't know. who cares?
it's okay that you are not here.
it's okay that i sleep restless every night.
its okay that you fill every single dream that enters my mind.
its okay that i don't see you.
its okay that i don't talk to you.
its okay that you swim in my thoughts.
its okay...
'you bitch.'
i know.
'you're a dork.'
i know.
'you suck.'
i know.
'what was that all about?'
...
'you're lying when you said all that..'
how'd you know?
'cause you're hiding..'
from what?
'from the fact..'
what fact?
'that you miss me.'
...
'do you?'
i.. i don't know.
'you don't know?'
...
'what?'
i know.
'know what?'
that i miss you.
'then why did you say all that?'
because..
'because?'
because missing you makes me wanna hug you.
because missing you makes me dream of you.
because missing you makes me think of you.
because missing you makes me wanna talk to you.
because missing you..
'yes?'
makes me cry.
* * *
'hello?'
...
'hey.. hush now.'
...
'don't cry.'
...
'you know why?'
...
'because i miss you too.'
...
'i miss you.'
...
really?
'...'
hey now.. don't cry.
# 1
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Posted at 5/20/2004 2:22:58 am by geLowish
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